Hiding your intimacy as a couple
Most parents have a tendency to hide their PDA and intimacy as a couple in front of their children. On the contrary, they never shy away from arguing or fighting with each other in front of their children’s ears. This is completely wrong in so many ways. It is a fact that children learn from what they see and children “not seeing” their parents romancing or as a loving couple makes a grave mental impact on their minds. Let’s make it simple; you want to teach your kids the beauty of a marriage, the love and the affection. They should not see just two people living together; they should see a romantic couple who steals in a kiss in the morning and cuddles while watching movies.
Hiding your past
As parents, everyone has had their share of “being rowdy” or “having fun” in their younger times. What a lot of parents tend to do is hide this unruly version of their younger self in front of their children. Parents of course do this to be good examples and to not teach their young ones to indulge in shenanigans. However, this practice is actually quite harmful in parenting. Children from a very young age love honesty and respond to openness. They open up and will share everything with their parents only when their parents are their “friends” and not just strict guardians. And the easiest path to a great friendship is honesty about oneself. So, parents please do not hide your student life love triangles or the sneaking in to clubs at night from your young ones. They will feel you are humane and will relate to you more as friends. Of course express your regret over things you did that backfired. This will give them clearer perspective of what not to do and why.
Not giving a proper sex education
Sex education at the right age for any child is one of the most important teachings trust me. It is extremely vital to the mental and even physical wellbeing of a child. Children without proper sex education can get indulged in so many inappropriate practices and activities that will scare the living daylights out of you parents. So, the prevention is actually pretty simple. Explain and talk to them about sex. Teach them what sex is in details when you sense they can understand it. Do not shy away and avoid this topic. Make an environment where your child will come to you first and foremost with a sex question and not to their friends. Moreover, do not hide your condoms and pad; these are normal products that are necessities and your child growing up in a surrounding with these topics and products considered normal would shape his mind around it as normal.
Always being the teacher
Relationships are a two-way street and a parent-child relationship is nothing very different from this. If your child is always learning from you and obeying you, this creates more of an authority than a relationship. Yes of course as parents, you are the one to impart wisdom and teachings to your little one. However, remember that you are not perfect or a Know-it-all, so keep an open mind to learn from your child too. When she has just told you about how she has used her pillows to make bookends, don’t dis the idea right away, appreciate it and be surprised at what you learnt from her. You get to boost your child’s creativity and intelligence in this way too.
Comparing your little one with other kids
How offensive and emotionally traumatizing this is! Many of my friends in their mid twenties tear up reminiscing their childhood full of comparisons. Comparing your young one with their friends or other kids impacts them beyond comprehension, demoralizes them for life and corrupts their self-esteem. “Why can’t you achieve higher grades like Jason? Don’t we feed you enough?” Accusations and charges like this pierce through a child’s mind and hit them hard. Please by all means, dear parents, steer clear of these comparisons.